HELP FOR THE HOME FRONT
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free newsletter by
DIAGNOSIS ADD ADHD Now What?
BJ Madewell - volunteer editor
Purpose: to present choices to consider AFTER a
diagnosis of ADD or ADHD.
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Published 10th, 20th & 30th of each month (usually)
** PLEASE SEE DISCLAIMER AT THE END OF THIS DOCUMENT! **
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HELP FOR THE HOME FRONT
Successful parents know how to build on the
strengths of the ADD/ADHD child to reduce the
impact of his neurological challenges. To build
on an ADD/ADHD child's strength of purpose
and reduce oppositional behaviors they:
Give him structure
in all aspects of his life.
Use lots of reminder notes, incentives, and
posted schedules to compensate for short-term
memory and personal organization problems.
Help him organize his space. Use "reminder
language" to give him specific behavioral
feedback on what he is doing. He may not
remember from the last time.
Help her set
goals. Goals give her focus
and are essential to her psychological survival.
Get on problems early and give him viable
acceptable choices. Use "positive" language:
"This is what I want you to do." – Avoid "don't
do" statements.
Know that you are in charge and keep
discussions cool and behaviorally specific. This
parental attitude is crucial to avoiding the push-
pull and psychological skirmishes that these
kids seem to enjoy. Be aware, they KNOW
how to push your buttons and do so often.
Give abundant meaningful
praise.
ADDers need our blessings to help them move
past the thousands of negative feedback
comments they get from others sometimes on
an hourly basis. They also know when praise is
not warranted and will mistrust praise if given
for "nothing."
Involve her in regular exercise to release
pent up energy and give her better focus. A
garage sale exercise cycle in her room will do
wonders.
If ADD type problems occur only at home
(does fine at school)
Check out home stressors.
Behaviors could be a reaction to home
stressors. If you see distractibility, over-activity
and impulsiveness in your child, and you're
going through separation, divorce, financial
problems, a critically ill relative, or other
troublesome times, the behavior might be
temporary.
Additionally, if the ADDer is on medication,
talk
to your doctor about a possible "rebound effect".
Realize that some
ADDers are able to
"maintain" all day at school and they "fall apart"
at home where they feel safe.
Choose your battles.
Child development experts often recommend
ignoring your child when his behavior is
something you don't like but can tolerate.
Eventually your child will stop the troublesome
behavior because he's not getting any attention
for it. "The trick is to strive to pay attention to
your child when he stops the behavior you
don't like and starts the behavior you do like,"
says Dr. Goldstein.
(NOT THAT EASY TO DO BUT WORTH THE
EFFORT. I'VE SEEN IT WORK!!!) -- BJ
Madewell -- editor
Be consistent.
"Set up and stick to schedules
and routines," suggests Dr.Goldstein. "Children
with attention problems often benefit from
consistent routines, including specific time
periods for watching television, doing
homework, playing, performing chores and
eating dinner."
Minimize disruptions.
When interruptions are unavoidable, however,
try to warn your child ahead of time that there's
going to be a change of schedule.
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IT'S YOUR CHOICE
Having an ADDer in the home is
difficult, to say
the least. Do your research, go to support groups in
your area, talk to other parents, get counseling
Find out how to minimize stress in your home for
yourself and
your ADDer.
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PLEASE VISIT MY WEBSITE
www.addchoices.com
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When the student is ready, the teacher will appear.
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THE FREE SPELLING AIDE IS POSTED AT
http://groups.yahoo.com/group/ADDchoices/files/Fr
eespbk.doc
GET YOURSELF A COPY
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DISCLAIMER
This information is for educational purposes only.
Much of the information is from classes and
workshops I've taken during my 26+ years of
working with ADD & ADHD students – sprinkled
with my own comments, thoughts and insights.
Some information has been acquired from the
INTERNET. Be aware that not all information on
the WWW is accurate. Use your own judgment.
This information is not intended to replace
information from your doctor, therapist, lawyer,
psychologist, nutritionist or psychiatrist. Consult
your child's (or your own) doctor for additional
input.
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Editor: BJ Madewell
Wichita, KS area
316-733-9532
FAX not available
Email ADDchoices@aol.com or
ADDchoices@yahoo.com
You may copy and print this newsletter for your
own use and freely distribute it to others. You
cannot sell this information. It is FREE.
Please include my email address & phone # on
anything you give to others.
BJ Madewell
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